There will be moments, on your mediumship journey, where you feel as if you are being tested constantly. Just as you surmise what you are to be learning in one scenario, another one so beautifully and catastrophically falls apart. & As frustrating as it can be, it is a signal that the Universe believes she can push a little more; there is still more perseverance in me to continue on and even give more.
I notice that in these moments, I am now able to cope. I approach each new issue with a little more understanding of myself. I know that the tests I am being given now are there because I would not be able to cope in the same way as I could five years ago... nor even one year ago.
I happened upon a channel, last night, that gave me space and an opportunity to reflect on my journey and how far I have come. I recalled every struggle and every moment of doubt--the tears, the hardship, the moments when I thought I could not longer go on because I had no idea how to figure anything out or even where to turn. Every single one of these moments have shaped my resilience and my understanding of self. & I would not change any of it. These times have led to a deeper mastery of self.
Change is Guaranteed in Life
When life is quiet, still, and "good", really bask in these moments--not to be a "Debbie-Downer", but they do not last. I find myself in the hub of drastic change right now. I am seeing it as an opportunity to further test my self-mastery. Change can be terrifying, but we cannot change if we are comfortable. Change means I am living and I am growing. I can either fight it with exhausted resistance, or I can surrender the control and decide to go with the flow--to follow the breadcrumbs...
It also means that I need to ask for support and be okay with it. Do you find it hard to ask for help or rely on someone? I did... but all it took was meditating on how I am already supported in my life. Focusing on those occasions where my son offered to help with his sister... or when my husband tags in and handles the kids, cooking, and cleaning. Or when my mom offers to take me out to lunch to help take my mind off of the minutia of life.
Gratitude is paramount when dealing with rounds of a crap hand of cards. Seems counterintuitive, but gratitude keeps your vibration high and keeps your focus on positivity. Learn from your mistakes and let healing happen!
There is a silver lining in every situation.
Even if you cannot see it immediately, it is there. I've been dealing with tough decisions and with each decision, I created a pros and cons list. I managed to turn each "con" into a "pro" and I found that my decisions were actually good problems to have and my issues no longer seemed heavy and daunting. I can appreciate that this can seem insulting to the seriousness of some of the positions we find ourselves in, but there is learning to be had--in every test, in every "bad" day. Catch yourself in the midst of a test and take responsibility for how you are feeling and coping with it. Do something about it.
You are a special soul, full of love and hope. You've got this....and I do, too.